Reality

Isn't it absolutely miserable to be able to immerse yourself in an amazing book that transports you to another reality , only for it to inevitably end , pulling you out of your glorified imagination , back into your own universe ? No ? You don't think so ? I guess your reality isn't as bad as mine is right now , then .

It feels like a high . Like you've left all your problems behind for a good 3 hours and all you can see and feel are the things the protagonist in the novel are seeing and feelings . Your problems fade , and life isn't as lame and mundane as it was before . You don't have to look around you and realise you're in the same fucking place , dealing with the same fucking dilemmas .

On another note , I'm so sick of writing . But it's the only thing I can do to keep myself from going crazy . It's the only thing I can do to release all this pent up rage . It's the only way I can fight back for now , because ranting isn't enough and if say your words aloud and no one remembers , they end up just disappearing into thin air , and it's like you've never said anything in the first place .

Can you believe October is almost over ? I've been at blu inc for over 2 months now and it isn't getting any better . My life feels like one perpetual countdown , waiting for things to finally go my way . I don't want to end up always waiting for the next best thing . That's not living . I am not living .

With that being said, 4 months to Melbourne .

Hahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahha .

I'm sorry , that was me genuinely laughing out loud at how pathetic I feel right now .

Goodnight world . I think I'm done with you for awhile .